A Gift of Love Wrapped in Fear

It’s a sunny, chilly November morning. I’m getting ready for a spiritual exercise, appreciating the beauty of the late Fall colors, and watching the birds breakfasting at our bird feeder. Suddenly, as if escaping some unseen predator, they shelter in the large bush at our front window.

“We are like that too, darling,” I perceive my beloved Grandma Minna saying to me inwardly. “Each of us has fears that spark a reaction of some kind. For me, I always wanted to face my fears, and so I did. You are facing yours too, my darling first grandchild. We are all here to help you face them one by one, starting with the one you are encountering now.”

Grandma Minna departed this world many years ago. Yet, she is as close as a simple turn of loving attention. She lives on, vibrant as ever, just using a heavenly body now.

I have grown to accept these nearly daily visits with her and other members of my heavenly family. They often occur as I center my heart in the love that always is. This is the universal love that gives us all life. I make a point of always keeping something nearby to write with. That way, I can easily capture what I am experiencing.

Opening to Love

Opening to love and writing what comes is a practice my husband and I developed over years of experimentation and application. It opens perception to inner wisdom and communication with loved ones while sitting privately and relaxing to explore a topic. Sometimes I choose the focus, sometimes—like today—ideas or a loved one just come into my attention, and sometimes inner knowing simply comes as I invite the Divine to show me what is in my best spiritual interest. With practice, inner wisdom and interaction with loved ones can come at any time we are open to the experience.

I ponder Grandma Minna’s message. “What fear of mine are you talking about, Grandma?” I ask inwardly. “Are you talking about our upcoming writing class we are planning to give to the public?”

“Honey, your work will always unfold for you and those you support. It’s the same here. Fear is universal and is not relegated to time-based events. What was, what will be, and how to navigate choppy waters are themes that everyone can relate to, my dear. Try asking a different question so we can focus our answer.”

As I wonder how to rephrase my question, I inwardly ask for spiritual guidance, “How can I best serve others during this inner visit with my grandmother? Is there a suggestion or a question that I can explore that will be of service to all?”

I perceive, “Try listening to what your heart is aching for or wanting to know.”

Aha! A question comes: “How can I best navigate my day and focus positively on the tasks at hand, despite my concerns about world events?”

“Yes,” Gram says, smiling, “this is the kind of question we are looking for. We have your whole mishpachah (family) here ready to help.”

My attention drifts to recent news with scenes that could make anyone cry, and I ask for assistance to understand. I become aware that my focus on what I don’t want (the horrors of war splashed in the news) is like fighting a battle within, and it is creating emotional pain and suffering within me. I realize that my sustained attention on the negative continues the angst—both in me and the world around me.

If you focus on Divine Spirit, this gives room for love to come into your being, calm troubled waters, and flow out to touch others,” I perceive inwardly. I am reminded that the purpose of the cascade of events on every level—environmentally, politically, economically, and globally—is to help awaken Soul.

“You are not alone, Liebchen,” I hear inwardly. I’m not sure what “Liebchen” means, so I look online and discover it means “dear one” or “sweetheart.”

Then I perceive another heavenly family member say, “Your grandmother and I will talk with you later—go take care of yourself first.” I am comforted knowing that help is near, and I also realize I’m hungry.

Challenge Often Brings Out the Best in Us

I have a satisfying breakfast of chopped apple, walnuts, cinnamon, and almond milk. As I’m finishing up, Michael Newton’s book, Journey of Souls, comes into my attention. Newton was a master hypnotherapist. Many of his clients shared their experiences between lifetimes. They revealed how many aspects of a person’s life are decided before coming into a specific lifetime: major turning points like choice of birth family, friendships, partners, children, life work, traumatic events, and death. The so-called “accidents” and “coincidences” in life are not random events, but, in fact, decided by us before coming into this lifetime. This may be hard to believe, but we plan these events to help us awaken to qualities of being and action we intend to develop this lifetime. Challenge often brings out the best in us.

Now my attention shifts to the spiritual dynamic of cause and effect. Since everything is interconnected, we cannot help but experience the effects of our thoughts, words, and actions. It works like this: what we give out comes back to us, like a boomerang. A real boomerang is for hunting, and if we aren’t careful, its return packs a wallop. The process of cause and effect is also like waves repeatedly washing ashore and retreating. We send out waves of thought and emotion, and they come back to us, often via the people in our lives and circumstances and conditions we live in. Gradually, we learn how to temper our judgments and feelings and grow in ways we never anticipated.

Gifts of Loving Support

I perceive a warm feeling as I place my attention on Grandma Minna. “Liebchen,” I hear inwardly. The presence in this voice is not Grandma’s. I wonder, “Who is saying that?” Cousin Bernice comes into my perception. She is like another daughter to my grandmother.

Bernice smiles inwardly at me with such warmth. “We know times are hard for you and many others too. When we were young, it was the Depression, and we remember difficult times as well. The war was starting (in 1939), and we were scared. We didn’t really understand everything, but we knew our family would keep us safe. You are worried for everyone—that is understandable but totally unnecessary. Does a bird worry that the wind will support its little body? Or if a feather should fall, does the bird worry, mein kin?”

“No, of course not,” I reply, wondering why she is speaking German. Then, I remember Yiddish is a form of German, so I relax. Our family elders often spoke in Yiddish so we children would not understand them. I say honestly, “It is, in fact, disheartening to see suffering all over the world, my dear cousin.”

“Of course, Rhondala, this is why we are here. We know that you and others are worried and afraid, and that is normal but not necessary.”

For some reason, I find myself chuckling at her comment, “not necessary,” as if this is something I can easily turn off, as if my feelings were connected to a switch.

Now I hear my grandmother chuckling. “When you were a young adult, I told you of my concerns, and you told me not to worry, and I smiled just as you are smiling. Now you understand, darling. It’s not as easy as it looks because worrying is what a mother or grandmother normally does. However, love is not about worrying; it’s about trusting our beloved Father/Mother. Do you trust God, dear?”

“I trust God, and yet I worry about the events affecting innocent lives,” I say downheartedly.

“True, my dear,” continues Cousin Bernice, “when I was a child, we were shielded from the bad news. Perhaps you can shield the little child inside from such bad news for a time and see how that affects you. You wouldn’t talk about such things with your son, would you?”

“Only if he wanted to talk about it, I suppose.”

“Then give your inner child a rest and focus your attention on the love that always is, darling,” my grandmother says carefully and with love. “Let the love that always is wash through you and soothe your troubled heart.

“Also, we can be of help to you, too. Each person’s heavenly family can help with anything tragic or difficult in life. That is our job—we are here to help relieve the worry, fear, angst—anything that hurts. What’s a heavenly family for—if not to care for those we love?”

I ponder her heartfelt words. Could it be that our family’s job in heaven is not only to watch over us, but to also help us live our lives better? Isn’t that what we do to help our children and loved ones here? So why wouldn’t our heavenly family do the same for us? We just need to be open to receive their loving help, guidance, and, when necessary, protection, too.

I notice a pair of cardinals in the bush out front. They are peering in the window. I quickly take a picture of them because they remind me of my heavenly family’s ever-present love. I realize they are messengers sent to give me a gift of heartfelt love. Smiling, I accept their gift. My heart is calm.

Divine love is always present, always offering us gifts. Are we watching and listening? Are we open to receiving and accepting them, however they may come wrapped?

Cardinal mates at window

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Rhonda Ings